Understanding…

It’s easy to love when you have love around.

Bart and I don’t have children. Don’t get me wrong, saying… kids are not for us. For more than one reason. Most important one is the fact that we never dreamed about a big family. Neither Bart, nor I. Second big reason is my illness. Bart is 44, I am 41. Sometimes I wonder how come we do not desire having kids. But we just don’t. However, I assure you this: every child looooves Bart. The reason? No idea! In the supermarket children are smiling at him, waving at him, they talk to him. It’s funny sometimes. They smile at me too, but I taste there is more connection with my husband. That is beautiful because we generous care about them. We enjoy having them around, just… not the whole time 😉

Our friends children are in our hearts too. Every time Tamara, a friend of mine, tells they are ill, or not so happy for a reason, my heart breaks. Tha’s what friendship is all about, I suppose. Sympathy that we have for each other.

And yet, I am a mam! Mother of a 4-legged beautiful dog, Viva. I have hard times calling myself her boss. I’m nobody’s boss. I am not an owner of her either. I have her, like you have your children, you don’t own them. So… in that case, I just call myself Viva’s mam. I will never know how it feels to have my own children and that’s ok. If I see loving, caring, beautiful families around me, I am chuffed too. If I see a dog and his… eum… mam or dad looking at each other full of understanding, I am a happy, very happy women too.

Lets don’t judge each other about our lives. We make our own choices. Let’s be tolerant and understanding. I know from my own experience it can be challenging… but you know what? I’m up to that challenge! Are you?

 

An old doggie, named Charlie…

No drug is stronger dan the love of a pet. No love more devoted.

By adopting a dog, your life changes. It is an other feeling than buying a pup. You are excited at any rate, of course. But adopting a pet, you realise you adopt his entire past too. Sometimes a very agonizing past. You have to be patient, tolerant, gentle. You need to give a pet the time needed to regain trust in people. Trust in living together. But be a leader at any time. Leadership is something a dog needs, beside all the love. And wow… a dog has such a big heart. He will be thankful for sure. He will be your soul mate for life.

A friend of mine, Sabine, has 4 dogs of her own. One of them is a pup, 1-year-old and so beautiful, named Casper. She thought her family was complete. 4 dogs, her husband and she. But then came Charlie. An old Jack Russel who was found on streets not far from where she is living. No chip. No owner founded. Watching him in a dog shelter, she decided to adopt that beautiful old doggie. It was a conscious decision. Joyfully Charlie was instant accepted by her pack. Casper, Ysis, Nubi and Titi became family of her new dog.

Sabine realises that a lot of care is needed for Charlie. He is at age and weak. His backpack is damages, his ribs bruised. His teeth are a disaster. But ok, he will get the time and care he needs. And knowing she will probably not have him for a long time… the wonderful feeling she gets by looking at him is the more that intense.

 

 

 

I met Charlie and was in love with him too. He is a sweetheart who found his home by Sabine and her dogs. I am very happy and thankful for that.

Please, give an old dog a chance. Give him your heart for the short period he has to spent with you. You will be his entire word. And yes, my husband and I want to adopt an old dog aswell when the time is right for us. You have to be ready to make that decision. It can’t be a caprice. A dog is not for a while, dog is for always

 

Sabine

Friends…

Once you learn how to be happy,

you won’t tolerate being around people

who make you feel anything less.

A few days ago I was chatting with my good friend Nadine, about how much we need friends around us. And I stuck with that thought for days now.

I give my heart and soul for those who are open to receive it. But unfortunately my heart and soul were trampled, more than once. We all have had that feeling of being betrayed and misunderstood and left alone by someone we cared for. We all know how it feels to be miserable and lonely from time to time, I guess.

I have troubles to trust people. Or I trust them too much. I can’t do things half way. It’s all or nothing for me, and that is a terrifying thought if you are scared to lose yourself to a friendship once more. It is scary to know that you have, once more, give it all and received that little.

People are opportunistic. We are. Think about it. We always want something in return. Even if we say we are not like that, the truth is… we are.

Friendship is supposed to work two ways. You give something, you get something in return. Even the smallest gesture is enough. But it hurts if you lose your energy helping others and the day you need help too, no-one is there.

My heart and tongue are one. I hardly think before speaking. So the honest opinion is out before I even realised I have said something. Now I’m older, not more in my twenty’s I become more prudent. I will always say what I mean, but I have learned, that sometimes it’s better to not saying a thing. I’m still learning to deal with it, sure. I still want to change people’s mind from time to time. I was born that way. In my family we all are good speakers and strong characters. Believe me, saying, you will not enjoy being around my family not knowing us. You will think we are fighting for life. But we don’t, we just all speak at the same time. Miraculously we have always understood each other.

My whole life I’ve heard I’m a leader, not a follower. And I guess I am. But if you want to be a leader, you have to take responsibilities. And I take mine to seriously. I wish I was able to relax more. I wish I was able to let things go more easily.

I believe that people we met, are there for a reason. They come and go. We may not force them to stay. Friendships grow with us and they vanish when no more needed.

I believe we have more that one best friend over the years… It’s unique to stay with someone many many years. Because you change and that person changes too. Not necessary in the same direction. I know people who stay friends knowing they have so little in-common those days, they irritating one and other, and yet… they can’t let go. If time is right… we will be forced to go on with our life, leaving some people behind. And that is not a bad thing.

And the truth need to be said: we all need a good friend.

Sometimes

you need to distance yourself

from people.

If they care,

they’ll notice.

If they don’t,

you know

where you stand.

 

 

Behind perfectly happy…

Are you happy? Your are? Being happy is not enough. It isn’t… At least if you look at social media like Instagram and see all the beyond perfect pictures of families and always smiling people. Then it hits you… being just happy is not enough. You have to be extremely happy. And then you, maybe, fit in…

Such a shame for all of us, living our life’s at Instagram, at FB. Walking around with our phones taking pictures of everything we see without looking at it. Forgetting to live the real life.

Such a shame to not feel the marvellous feelings the fake pictures are telling us.

I am hooked by social media too. Sure I am. I’m not different.

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Because of the algorithms, a few days not liking, means not receiving posts from your friends. We have to stay on top of it. Well, do we have to? No, we want to. But do we really want to?? Do we? Counting likes is a daily routine for many of us. We want to live like in heaven. Daily. And a perfectly timed picture is a perfect proof of that. On paper we do live that life, on paper understood. We are obsessed with happiness. Everything has to be good, better, the best. Living a life, dough, is not like that, unfortunately. We have good days and in-between not that good days. Bed days have their entrance too. That’s life. For every one of us. Whether we want to, or not. For me, being happy is to accept the fact, happiness isn’t always around. And that’s fine. You can’t admire light, without darkness.

If we show the real us, we feel liberating. If we talk how we really feel, we can let things go.

Social media takes so much of our attention, we lose the connection with ourselves from time to time.

Let us live our ordinary lives like it comes. Let us make the best of it, like it is. Please, let us speak to each other in words coming out of our mouths instead of words written down in Messenger, WhatsApp or else.

Are you obsessed by social media? Those steps might help. Detoxing social media

I wish I could give you a hug. Not a virtual one, but a warm hug, my body against yours… just for a second. Just to warm up our minds… to be happy 🙂

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